Make Fear Your Friend

 "Let fear be a counselor, not a jailer."

- Tony Robbins

As a lifelong student of self exploration, I'm continuously trying to find new ways and opportunities to become a better, well rounded me for myself, those around me, and this world. Throughout this journey, I've been able to begin to identify core self limiting thoughts and fears that I've been holding in my subconscious that have been a plague in my evolution as a human. And once identified, I can do the necessary work to overcome them. I've tried several different approaches, while some have worked better than others, I'm always on the lookout for new tactics.

One thing that I've recently found and have been trying is a concept of making your fears your friends. This is an interesting concept if you think about what a friend is to you... someone who is always there to support you, someone to laugh and chat with, someone who shares similar thoughts and dreams as you, and someone who you trust with your life. And the entire relationship is reciprocal, where you too have a responsibility to be the same for the other person. There is also a sense of personal ownership in a friendship, where you have the power to guide the relationship. You get what you put in. If done right, friendship can be one of the most powerful and fruitful forces in our lives.

Now imagine if you treat your fears like you would your friend. How would your point of view of your fears change? How would your frame of reference change? How much focus would you put on the positive vs the negative aspects? Let's take money for an example. A lot of people are afraid of money. For a lot of people, money is a source of pain and lack as there is never enough or it's always causing issues and arguments with those around them. Now what happens if that fear of money relationship turns into a friendship?

An entire shift happens. In a friendship, you give yourself the expectation of love and abundance. There is no lack in friendship, only respect and reciprocity. So as you start to love and respect what money brings into your life, respect its point of view, respect what value it brings, while maintaining yourself and your identity in the relationship you will see your fears start to disappear. The mutual respect you have for each other will become a strong bond, one where you grow together.

Now take that mentality and put it against your limiting fears, whether it be scared to speak up in a meeting, afraid of being wrong in front of colleagues or investors, or a fear of being successful. Imagine what the relationship with that fear could be if you simply change your point of view.

What methods do you use for overcoming fears in your life or business? What's holding you back?